It Grows Inside Of Me

The tests all say that something alien grows inside of me

The signs all point to a vast and potent malignancy

Surgeons suggest I undergo a non-invasive operation

Radiologists recommended a course of ionizing radiation

They found a bunch of lesions and my numbers are all too high

Of course, at first, all that I could do was just keep on asking why

I sometimes feel like those who house a worm so large that it barely fits

But this stuff won’t ever be expelled just by the mere taking of a shit

Some oncologist offered up a regimen of targeted, toxic chemotherapy

Long ago the church would have condemned all their stuff as evil heresy

Perhaps it was my genes, diet, poor attitudes, stress or the stuff that’s in the air

Anyway, this is the end of my illusion of living forever, without a care

They said that it may be spreading further on out into my spleen

I’ve done some thinking and decided to try not to be quite so mean

Just now it’s starting to metastasize into my delicate pancreas

So I need not even tell that fat and lazy clerk that she can kiss my ass

It lives and grows inside of me, so I guess it must be part of me

Others shake their heads, glad they have not lived so wickedly

I think about the chronic pain, the growing weakness and the bed sores

They shake their heads and whisper…once they’re safe, outside my door